Get a Life? Got One.

Yesterday, when Wade came home from work, I told him that I started a blog.  He replied with, "Cool! What's it about?  The life of a young mother?"  I was sure he must have saw what I had named this blog when he was behind me as I was on the computer.  He told me he didn't see what I wrote, but said, "What else would you blog about?"

Initially, I took this as offensive.  I'm not sure why.  I showed him my best sad face, and said to him, "I don't have a life".

"Yes you do!" He told me.  "I just know what it is."

It's easy to put yourself down as a mom.  It can sometime feel like what you do is useless, boring, and like you should be doing more.  Since I am a stay-at-home mom, I feel this to the extreme.  I know many other mothers who are going to school or taking online courses, who have jobs, and can still keep their house clean.  When I think of them, I feel like I may not be enough.  It's too easy to compare myself to others.

I try to make myself feel better by telling myself that I have a husband who has a job that gets us by, and if I worked, we would have to pay for child-care.  Also, I have a six month old who still needs me at home.  I still feel like people think little of me.

I've visited with people who talk down about people who still live in Outlook because it must mean they made bad choices, but little do they know that some of those people have started their own businesses, or have their own house, or are saving up to move.  A friend of mine said that "maybe it was time (insert name here) moved to the city." implying that a small town was no good for them.  I like living here because I know that it's a pretty nice place to raise my kids.

I know many people my age are at university.  They are studying to become great things.  Good for them.  Maybe that wasn't for me.  However, just like some of them might become something great, others may not.  For example, one of them may become a beloved teacher to many, and others might not have their heart in it and do a poor job.

I know my heart is in everything I do to the maximum.   What I want in my life right now is to be the best mom that I can be.  No, it's not a paying job.  I can't get a promotion.  I screw up a lot, but I always try to be better.  I found something I care about, and  I'm okay with spending my life doing this.

My friends may go on to become doctors, lawyers, teachers, and anything else under the sun, and they might become parents on top of that.  I hope they do.  Maybe, eventually I will become something more, but for now, doing what I love and striving to be better every day is enough for me to live for.  I have a life,  and it's great.